Blade Pakkiri's Punjabi Dhaba

WHAT DO YOU CALL A FUNNY SURD?
Amuse Singh

WHAT DO YOU CALL A SURD WHO OWNS A BEAUTY PARLOUR?
Wax Singh

WHAT DO YOU CALL A SURD WHO’S FULL OF HYPE?
Advertise Singh

WHAT DO YOU CALL A SURD WHO WANTED TO BE AN AE?
Service Singh

WHAT DO YOU CALL A SURD WHO’S A MARRIAGE BROKER?
Match Fix Singh

WHAT DO YOU CALL A COOL SURD?
Pierce Singh

WHAT DO YOU CALL A SURD WHO NEVER GETS YOUR JOKE?
Still Process Singh

WHAT DO YOU CALL A SURD WHO FIRES EMPLOYEES?
Right Size Singh

WHAT DO YOU CALL A SURD WHO CAN PREDICT THE FUTURE?
Crystal Gay Singh

WHAT DO YOU CALL A SURD WHO GETS SCREWED LEFT, RIGHT & CENTER?
Manmohan Singh

Adi Kadi # 13

ANDHRA KARANUKKU PIDIKAADHA TEA EDHU?
Gol-tea.

Blade Pakkiri's Russian Roulette

WHAT DO YOU CALL A STINKING RUSSIAN?
Yuri Nal

WHAT DO YOU CALL A RUSSIAN WHO LOVES INDIAN JUNK FOOD?
Dmitri Vadapov

WHAT DO YOU CALL A RUSSIAN CHEF WHO’S INTO SOUTH INDIAN CUISINE?
Ivan Dosamov

WHAT DO YOU CALL A SWEET RUSSIAN LADY IN CHENNAI?
Marina Palgova

WHAT DO YOU CALL A RUSSIAN WHO IS PERPETUALLY UNDER PRESSURE?
Konstantin Dabov

WHAT DO YOU CALL A CORRUPT RUSSIAN WHO NEEDS KICKBACKS ALL THE TIME?
Boris Paisalov

WHAT DO YOU CALL A RUSSIAN WHORE?
Tatiana Bajadiuski

WHAT DO YOU CALL A RUSSIAN WHO INVARIABLY GETS THRASHED?
Maxim Markhov

WHAT DO YOU CALL A RUSSIAN MAFIAMAN?
Vladimir Mobokov

WHICH GRAND MASTER COULD COMFORTABLY PASS HIMSELF OFF AS AN ANDHRAITE?
Gary Kaspa Rao

Blade Pakkiri Turns Blade Pakkilee

WHICH IS BRUCE LEE’S FAVOURITE MUSHY SONG?
Trulee, Madlee, Deeplee.

WHAT DO YOU CALL THE EMPTY HEADED COUSIN OF BRUCE LEE?
Kha Lee

TWO OF BRUCE LEE’S NEPHEWS FELL IN LOVE WITH A MORONIC GIRL. AN ENTERPRISING BOLLYWOOD FILMMAKER MADE A HINDI FLICK ON THIS LOVE TRIANGLE. NAME THE FILM FOR ME.
Ek Fool Do Malee

HOW DOES A BRUCE LEE TOY FEEL?
Cudd Lee

WHAT’S THE NAME OF BRUCE LEE’S SISTER IN LAW?
Sa Lee

WHICH IS BRUCE LEE’S FAVOURITE TOURIST SPOT?
Ba Lee

WHAT’S THE NAME OF BRUCE LEE’S RELATIVE WHO BECAME A POET?
PB Shelee

WHAT’S THE NAME OF BRUCE LEE’S FAT AUNT?
Rollee Pollee

WHAT’S THE NAME OF BRUCE LEE’S NEICE WHO WAS FAMOUS FOR HER RUNNING NOSE?
Mook Shall Lee

WHAT DO YOU CALL BRUCE LEE’S WIDOW?
Amanga Lee

Kadi Boli # 1

Uttar Pradesh kay kuch gaon mein, aaj bhi, na nal hai, na urinal.

Blade Pakkiri Climbs The Mount

WHAT DO YOU CALL AN ANGLO INDIAN DJ?
Recording

WHAT DO YOU CALL A FOUL MOUTHED ANGLO INDIAN?
Scolding

WHAT DO YOU CALL AN ANGLO WHO OWES PEOPLE MONEY?
Outstanding

WHAT DO YOU CALL AN ANGLO WHO’S ABOUT TO CROAK?
Fading

WHAT DO YOU CALL A MISCHEIVOUS ANGLO?
Just Kidding

WHAT DO YOU CALL AN OBSESE ANGLO WHO’S TAKEN TO DIETING?
Load Shedding

WHAT DO YOU CALL AN ANGLO WHO’S A PIECE OF SHIT?
Dingleberry

WHAT DO YOU CALL AN ANGLO WHO MAKES CHINESE CLOCKS?
Ding Dong

WHAT DO YOU CALL AN ANGLO WHO DABBLES IN TYPOGRAPHY?
Wing Ding

WHAT IS THE ANGLO’S FAVOURITE SONG?
Chuck Berry’s ‘Ding-a-ling’

Adi Kadi # 13

WHICH FOLK SINGER IS HUGELY POPULAR WITH ORNITHOLOGISTS?
'Paravai' Muniyamma.

Blade Pakkiri's Kutchery

WHICH RAAGA IS A HOT FAVOURITE WITH BEER GUZZLERS?
Kalyani

WHICH RAAGA IS QUITE POPULAR WITH CATS?
Meow Ki Malhaar

WHICH RAAGA WILL THEY PLAY AT RAILWAY STATIONS?
Aa-bogey

FAST FOOD RESTAURANTS WILL LOVE THIS RAAGA. WHICH ONE?
Comboji

NAME THE RAAGA THAT’S DEAR TO VEGETABLE VENDORS.
Keerai-vani

WHICH RAAGA IS LIKELY TO BE A HIT WITH ACCOUNTANTS?
Bill-a-hurry

WHICH RAAG IS BEST FOR PEOPLE WHO LISTEN TO A LITTLE CARNATIC MUSIC?
Thodi

JEWS DON’T RELISH THIS RAAGA. WHICH ONE?
Arabi

WHICH RAAGA IS A RAGE WITH SUN TV?
Kalaanidhi

WHICH RAAGA IS ALWAYS ON ASHA BHOSLE’S LIPS?
Panchamam

Blade Pakkiri's Sting Operation

WHAT DO YOU CALL A BEE IN A QUANDARY?
Maybee

WHAT DO YOU CALL A FAT BEE?
Chubbee

WHAT DO YOU CALL A COUGHING BEE?
TB

WHAT DO YOU CALL A BLONDE BEE?
Barbee

WHAT DO YOU CALL A TAMILIAN BEE?
Thambee

WHAT DO YOU CALL A SHORT TEMPERED BEE?
Crabbee

WHAT DO YOU CALL A JEWISH BEE?
Rabbee

WHAT DO YOU CALL A SOULLESS BEE?
Zombee

WHAT DO YOU CALL AN ACTOR BEE?
Big B

WHAT DO YOU CALL A DREAMER BEE?
Wannabee

WHAT DO YOU CALL A COMICAL BEE?
Weatherbee

WHAT DO YOU CALL A WRITER BEE?
HB

WHAT DO YOU CALL A BEE WITH A SWEET TOOTH?
Jilaybee

WHAT DO YOU CALL A BEE’S FIANCÉ?
Would-bee

WHAT DO YOU CALL A BEE’S SPOUSE?
Bee Bee

WHAT DO YOU CALL A BEE THAT WATCHES HINDI MOVIES OFF AND ON?
Kabee Kabee

WHAT DO YOU CALL A BEE WITH A LONG LIFE?
Lumbee

WHAT DO YOU CALL A NEW BEE IN TOWN?
Ajnabee

NAME THE BEE’S ONLY HOLIDAY.
Milad-un-Nabee

WHAT DO THE BEES LOVE PLAYING?
Frisbee

Adi Kadi # 12

WHO IS THE COOLEST BUSINESSMAN IN TAMIL NADU?
AC Muthiah.

Adi Kadi # 11

WHAT WOULD YOU CALL A 'SHAPELY HIPS BEAUTY CONTEST' IN TAMIL?
Idai Therdhal.

Adi Kadi # 10

WHY IS TAMIL SNACK FOOD BEST SUITED FOR THOSE WHO LOVE DIETING?
Because Tamil snack food is all about consuming Thin Pandangal.

Blade Pakkiri Kills The Bong

WHAT DO YOU CALL A RAMBLING BONG?
Ver Bose

WHAT DO YOU CALL A SPORTY BONG?
Adi Das

WHAT DO YOU CALL A BONG WHO’S THE RESERVED TYPE?
Babu More Shy

WHAT DO YOU CALL A BONG WHO’S A GEM OF A SINGER?
Tan Sen

WHAT DO YOU CALL A DOG-LOVING BONG?
Bow-mick

WHAT DO YOU CALL A NOODLES-LOVING BONG?
Chow-dary

WHAT DO YOU CALL A BILLBOARD-LOVING BONG?
Banner-jee

WHAT DO YOU CALL A DUCK-LOVING BONG?
Ganguly

WHAT DO YOU CALL A BONG WHO LOVES TO GO ON STRIKE?
Bandh-o-padhyay

WHAT DO YOU CALL A TALL BONG WHO LOVES DANCING?
Lamba-da

WHAT DO YOU CALL A BONG WITH A SPLIT PERSONALITY?
Dey (as in They)

IF THE PHANTHOM COMIC WERE TO BE MADE AS A BONG MOVIE, WHAT WOULD BE AN APT TITLE?
The Ghosh Who Walks.

IAN FLEMING ONCE HAD ASTORY IDEA ABOUT A QUAINT BENGALI COUPLE WHO NEVER MEET EACH OTHER, BUT STILL KEEP THEIR ROMANCE ALIVE BY EXCHANGING LOVE LETTERS, ALL THEIR LIVES. CAN YOU GIVE ME THE NAME OF THIS SEMINAL BOOK, WHICH NEVER SAW THE LIGHT OF THE DAY?
Chitti Chitti Bong Bong

WHICH BONG HOLDS THE RECORD FOR VISITING THE MOST NUMBER OF PLACES?
Kil Roy. They say, wherever he went, he wrote ‘Kil roy was here’.

BINNY, BEEDI & BITCHY ARE THREE WORDS BONGS ASSOCIATE WITH X. NAME X.
Julius Caesar.

Adi Kadi # 9

WHAT'S THE TAMIL WORD FOR 'LIGHT PAIN'?
Deepa-vali.

Adi Kadi # 8

Broker: Saar oru super jaathagam irukku. Ponnu peru Vibha. Software padichurukka. Nalla kudumbam. Nalla sambalam. Nalla samaippa. Yane, onga paiyan Chaari madhiri nalla kadi jokekum adipa. Paarkalaama?
Father of groom: No. Vanedaam. Vittudunga.
Broker: Yane vanedaamnu solreenga?
Father of groom: Ada poya! Marriage mudinjaatu maatu ponnu peru vibha-chaari nu aiyidum. Enga maanam kappal eri poyidum.

Adi Kadi # 7

GAJNI PADAM KADHAANAYAGAN SANJAY RAMASAMY ATM LENDHU PANAM WITHDRAW PANRADHUKKU THAAN KAYILLA OREY ORU CLUE TATTOO PANNI VECHURUPAAR. ADHU ENNA? ADHUKKU PINNADI YENNA LOGIC?
Tattoo: Ask a girl for the PIN number. Logic: Penn budhi, PIN buddhi.

Adi Kadi # 6

WOMAN-1: ONGA PURUSHAN HOTEL VEKKIRITHUKKU MUNAALA BANK LA VELAI PAARTHARA, ENNA?
Woman-2: Eppidi kandu pidicha?
WOMAN-1: ADHAAN DAILY VIDAAMA, BREAK FASTUKKU 'VANGI BATH' PODRAAREY!

Adi Kadi # 5

WHAT DO YOU CALL AN INTERNET SAVVY TAMIL AUNTY?
eMami.

Blade Pakkiri's Mixed Raita

NORMAL COUPLES PREFER DATING. THE ADVENTUROUS ONES FAVOUR BLIND DATING. WHAT DO ARCHAELOGIST COUPLES FANCY?
Carbon Dating.

WHAT DO YOU CALL A HOPELESS MALLU WHO ALWAYS FINISHES LAST?
Abys-mull.

WHY DID THE SARDARJI BUY AN IRON BOX FROM THE ELECTRICAL STORE?
Because his doctor told him he had iron deficiency.

LUCIANO PAVAROTTI WOULD BE ELECTED THE MAYOR OF THIS CITY WITHOUT ANY DIFFICULTY. WHICH CITY?
Obesity.

NAME THE ANTHEM OF CHESS PLAYERS IN VARANASI.
Khayikae pawn banaras wala…

WHICH KEY DID THE CHOR USE FOR BREAKING INTO A BUNGALOW WITH AN UNBREAKABLE DARWAZA?
Khid-key.

HUSBAND: ENNA KITCHENLA OREY DAMAAL DOMEEL NU SOUNDU?
Wife: ‘Idi’ appam panrane, adhaan!

VEERAMANI: YANE SAAR DRAVIDA KAZHAGAM KU IPPO MADHIPEY ILLA?
Numerologist: Decay nu peyar vecha adu dhaney nadakkum.

WATCHING WHICH KAMAL FLICK COULD BE INIMICAL TO A DOG’S HEALTH?
Tick Tick Tick

WHY SHOULD MASSAGE PARLOURS BE FREELY ALLOWED IN INDIA?
Because India supports the ‘Freedom of Press’.

Blade Pakkiri's Dance Class

WHAT DO YOU CALL A STUNNING LOOKING DANSEUSE IN TAMIL?
‘Aatam’ Bomb.

BRUCE LEE HAD A DISTANT COUSIN WHO LEARNT BHARATANATYAM. WHAT WAS HIS NAME?
Salangai O Lee.

WHAT’S THE NAME OF SATYAJIT RAY’S NEICE WHO BECAME A RAGE BY PERFORMING IN MANY NIGHT CLUBS IN KOLKATTA?
Caba Ray.

MANOJ NIGHT SHYAMALANUKKU PIDICHA DANCE EDHU?
‘Twist’ Dance.

WHAT DO YOU CALL A DANCE TEACHER IN HINDI?
Ghun-guru.

IF SIVAJI GANESAN HAD PLAYED A BALLET DANCER, WHAT WOULD HAVE BEEN AN APT TITLE FOR THE MOVIE?
Ballet Pandya.

THE NOW FAMOUS EPANG, OPANG & CHAPANG WERE OFFSPRINGS OF THE LEGENDARY SIKKIMESE BOXER NAMED DAPANG. THIS CELEBRATED PUGILIST HAD A VERY UNIQUE STYLE OF LANDING PUNCHES ON HIS OPPONENTS. WHICH DANCE FORM DID THIS FREESTYLE OF BOXING, INSPIRE?
Dapang Kuthu.

WHICH INDIAN DANCE WAS SO ENCHANTING THAT THE GREEKS WROTE AN EPIC ABOUT IT?
Odissi.

WHICH DANCE FORM IS OFTEN HERALDED BY THE APPEARANCE OF A METRO WATER TANK IN CHENNAI?
The ‘Tap’ Dance.

WHICH BRAND OF ICE CREAMS IS HUGELY POPULAR WITH DANCERS IN VIENNA?
Walls.